Drama Triangle
The Drama Triangle is a model that helps us to recognise when we are in an unhelpful pattern of relationship with others. We can all get into each of these positions, though we often have a tendency towards a particular one. It’s useful to reflect on how we might behave in each position. Familiar patterns might be:
Person A (Victim) feels helpless, overwhelmed and hopeless, expresses this to another
Person B (Rescuer) frantically offers solutions, tries to help in any way possible (“Why don’t you”)
Person A rejects any offer of help (“Yes, but”)
This goes on…and on
Until eventually either Person A or Person B becomes angry and moves into Persecutor.
There are many other patterns that get played out in relationships, leading to many different outcomes, ranging from the irritating to the catastrophic.
Eric Berne wrote a book called Games People Play, that describes the many ways we can get into this sort of dynamic. The word ‘game’ implies fun, but the being on the Drama Triangle is no fun. Everyone ends up feeling bad.
If this is ringing any bells for you, congratulate yourself on your self-awareness and insight.
Ref: Karpman, S. (1971) Options. Transactional Analysis Journal, 1 (1) 79-87
